Closed Door. Open Heart.

Happy Saturday! 

I don't know about you, but I've been up since about 5:30 this morning. I'm just itching to get this weekend started. I have so much I want to get done and I'm so excited about the future (this weekend and beyond) I just want to go! In fact, after I write this blog post I'll be heading to the gym for a delightfully torturous leg day. What am I becoming???

Anyway, I wanted to get a little more real with what has been going on around SweetBirch HQ for the last year or so. When Chad and I felt led to move to North Carolina, we had this idea that God was going to bless our obedience with this influx of clients for both of our businesses. We came here knowing absolutely nobody and no clients for either of us on the horizon. But, we trusted that we were doing the right thing and this is where God wanted us. It seemed a little crazy because things were actually going pretty well for us in California but we just knew it wasn't our forever place. We knew that God had bigger things for us and where we were was not it. 

Fast forward a baby and a year and we were still in the same place business-wise that we had been when we moved here. Sure, I had gained a couple of awesome clients here but most of my business was still coming from California and it was few and far between. Chad kept coming up against roadblocks for his sports training business and we both felt like we were just running on a giant wheel and getting nowhere. We were distraught, confused, angry, fearful. We felt like God led us to this amazing place, introduced us to our incredible church family and then turned His face away from us. Left us in the wilderness to figure it out for ourselves. We began to doubt our move here and if we had done the right thing. That is and always will be a slippery slope. It caused more confusion, more doubt, more fear and made us more angry. 

Then a couple of months ago our church did a Bible study in the book of Mark. We called it The Jesus Way. One of the stories was the miracle of the feeding of the 5,000. Having grown up in church, I had heard this story hundreds of times. But, this time something stood out to me. Jesus instructed his disciples to gather all they had and give it to Him and he multiplied it. That part stuck out to me the most. "Give me all that you've got". But it felt like there was a double meaning to that sentence for me in particular. God wasn't just asking me to give Him all that I have got he was calling me to give Him all that I have got as well! I know, what you're thinking...they sound the same.

But, look again. The best way I can explain this is to use words that would make my former English-teacher mother cringe (sorry mom). This is what I read from that seemingly one-dimensional, simple phrase.

"Give me ALL you've got & Gimme all Ya got!"

He was wanting me to do more than just give over to Him all that I have, He was commanding me to give Him (or my business) all that I have within me. Work harder. Give it all you've got. That's the second part after giving everything over to him. Revelation! That is what He will bless!!!So, I did just that. For the next few months I studied marketing techniques, got more active on social media, prayed for more clients, sought out clients everywhere, begged for more clients and worked every spare moment I had. The clients came pouring in! Right? Right!?!?!

Nope. Not even what I would call a trickle...more like an-anti trickle... In fact, I got several requests for quotes but then after responding the potential would suddenly decide they didn't need me. This was extremely frustrating. Why show me this little glimmer of hope just to yank it away?!? It literally felt like a slammed door time after time after time. So I found myself on my knees again demanding to know what He thought He was doing. Every time I got the same answer...."keep going I'm doing something." All evidence to the contrary. I began searching for something, anything that would bring in some sort of a consistent income while Chad tried to follow his dream. I stopped asking or caring what God had to say. It was clear that He was not going to bless my passion. He was definitely not for us in my eyes. 

Right around that time, my church started another study centered around a book called "The Circle Maker" by Pastor Mark Batterson. It's about praying circles around your God-dreams and learning how to pray through to the miracles. God-dreams can best be described as promises you receive from God. Your biggest dreams that are God-willed for your life. Dreams that only HE can make happen with miracles. Something that you can't do on your own. Ummm Yes, yes and yes. I knew that God had called me to the graphic design field, He had given me this skill and this passion. I think we had proven here that I definitely could not make this business a success on my own and we definitely needed a miracle here! Reading through the book, I positioned myself to hear from Him, for the revelation. What I got was the same sort of thing I got in the last study. Work like it depends on you, pray like it depends on God. Yeah. What have I been doing for the 4 months?

After praying a circle around it I got an awesome potential client and then they decided to put it on hold all of a sudden. At that point, it was clear that God was definitely wanting to share something with me...I just didn't know what. In a group study on the book one night and after having exhaustedly voiced our situation to a lovely couple in our church. The husband said to me. "What else could you do with this skill?"

"Nothing, it's graphic design...you can be a graphic designer!" I exclaimed.

"But, maybe there is another avenue you could take with it?" He asked. 

I gave him no answer.

See, my real God-Dream is that I am able to exclusively design what I am most passionate about. Prints for the home, personalized baby books and event stationary. I like to be present in people's lives when they are at their happiest! A big event in their life. Having a baby and decorating the nursery, getting married, moving into a new home. I like to heighten that for them. Joy-inducing items, that's what I wanted to create one day. Granted, I have an Etsy shop that gets a sale every few months....I do only have 10 prints in there (9 of which are baby super-heros but still) I didn't have time to chase that, I'm trying to make a living here!

So, last Saturday I got up particularly early and read some more of my book, read my Bible and went outside on my porch to pray. Closer to nature, closer to God right? I finally threw my hands up and said "what would You have me do here". 

"I want you to follow that dream".  

It was instantaneous. It was clear. It was beautiful. It was peace.

That Monday, I sold an Etsy print. I got another Etsy order just this past Friday. I've never had two in a week for the year I've had a shop! So, where does that leave me? Well, after much prayer and thought I have decided to shut down part of the company and follow that dream. SweetBirch Designs will no longer be taking on clients for business related items or websites. No logos, no branding. All passion. All God-dreamed stuff.

 Now, I must clarify here, I love my current clients. I will not be leaving you in a lurch. I feel like it's not His desire for me to cut off relationships like that. So, if you need something from me. I am still here. I am just not going to chase after the dollar anymore like that. It's not my most passionate self. I want to do nothing more than what I love with the skill that He has given me. 

Over the next few months I'll be revamping my branding to match this new direction. Website, business cards...total overhaul. 

 Am I scared? Uh, yeah. I'm shutting down the only part of my company that has really ever brought in some sort of real income for my family. But, saying that I'm excited is the biggest understatement of the year! I'm ecstatic! All along I was giving Him my all...but into the wrong thing! Will this be everything I need it to be financially for us? Not a clue...Know what I do know? Where we lack, God will pick up the slack.

As a gift for reading this novel (sorry about that) I want to give you a print that I envisioned after reading "The Feeding of the 5,000". Download it, print it out, hang it on your heart (or a wall). Hopefully it's the inspiration for you that it is for me. Follow your God-Dreams. Do it. He's on your side!

What do I need from you? Support! This can be so much more than just buying a print from my shop! Pray for this direction and God's blessing on it. Share my prints / company / story with your friends and family! Help us grow!

Click here to download!

Thanks friends!